11/17/2014

First a Gift, then a Giver: A Birth Momma's Journey

I've met a lot of people in my life who have impacted me in profound ways.

Miranda is one of them.

I worked with Miranda in my previous "life" as a television news reporter.

I learned how adoption impacted her in BIG ways.

And I'm excited she's comfortable sharing part of her story with you all.
Here's Miranda in her own words...

I am fortunate to have been touched by adoption in a full-circle way.

My birth mother was 17 when she chose to make an adoption plan for me.

She was young and confused, but fortunately not alone.

My adoptive mother -- her sister -- had recently been told that she wasn’t able to have children.

While I was not raised in a traditional open adoption (I didn’t learn who my biological parents were until the age of 16), I was raised knowing my story and being taught that adoption is a wonderful, selfless act of giving.

Even though my family gave me a wonderful life, I managed to get myself into some questionable
situations as a teen.

I found myself pregnant at the age of 16.

I was in no way prepared for this, so I decided it would be best to place my child for adoption.

I chose the perfect family for her, and I involved them in every part of my pregnancy possible, even having them fly in from Ohio the week I was to be induced.

The whole nine months, I knew the child growing inside me was not my own, but a gift for a well-deserving family who had been to hell and back in search of completion.

When I delivered my daughter, I had a uterine inversion (a rare condition affecting 1 in 3,000 pregnancies).

I lost nearly all the blood in my body and almost died.

When I came to, I was told I was fortunate to be alive and that I would likely have no more children.

Under the advice of my family and the adoptive family, the decision was made to keep my daughter.

I lived with the guilt of “stealing” this family’s child for a year, until I received a letter from them stating they were due to deliver their own miracle baby in December of that year.

God really does work in mysterious ways!

The statistics proved to be wrong anyway...
By the age of 21, I was a single mother of two, pregnant yet again and alone.

I was barely able to care for myself and the children I had.

Feeling hopeless, I turned to my family and let them know I was again considering adoption.

Of course we knew people who were unable to have children, as this is a terrible issue for many couples everywhere, so like my birth mother I was blessed to be able to help family members.
My aunt and uncle had always wanted a child, but were unable to conceive.

I’m blessed to watch him grow as a healthy, beautiful, and sweet boy.
As someone who has had a full-circle adoption experience, here are three things I’d like others to know about adoption:

1. Adoption is not certain. 

I’ve seen and heard many stories of grief in the adoption process. As I’ve shown above, anything can happen.

If you are looking to adopt, do not let your heart be broken, do not lose hope.

All things come in God’s time.

2. Adoption does not hurt. 

When a pregnant woman knows that she will not raise the child she is giving birth to, the giving is a joyous event—not a loss.

If you are pregnant and considering adoption, do not be afraid to let go.

No matter what your reason, do not feel guilty.

The greatest love is shown in the act of giving a child a wonderful life, whether that is with you or a different family.

3. The rewards are immeasurable --on both sides. 

There is literally nothing in the world that gives me more joy than seeing my children happy.

Besides maybe knowing that I was able to give another mother that joy. ;)


As part of National Adoption Month, This Family's Journey is featuring families impacted by adoption and what they've learned along the way. Wanna join in? Click here to connect. Wanna read all the guest posts from National Adoption Month? Click here.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, how interesting life can be!

    I sure appreciate Miranda sharing her experiences and am glad for the peace she has.

    ReplyDelete