What You're Really Doing...

I cringe every time I see photos that compare parents’ appearances to those of their children.

Is it cute to see how you looked when you were just a few years old?


Especially those glasses.

Oh my gawd. 

The glasses.

Did your mom actually allow you to wear those in first grade?! ;)

Is it cute to show off pictures of your own child?


I do it on my Facebook page all the time.

But what I don’t like is stuff like this:

My inner Momma Bear comes out when people [like TODAY.com yesterday] encourage others to compare and share photos IF their child looks just like them.

I responded to TODAY.com with my two cents, and it was published!

The truth is, I get a lil' uneasy when a mom shares plasters a picture of her [young] self and compares it to her young daughter and says, “Like mother like daughter!”

Or when a dad’s photo is compared to his son’s photo with a caption that reads, “Good looks must run in the fam!”

Since when did family become defined by physical characteristics?
My daughter looks nothing like me.

I am her mother, but she will never look anything like me. 

Our skin colors are different. 

Our hair colors and hair textures will likely never be similar. 

And that’s OK!

But what’s not OK is for people to keep feeding into this notion that “families look alike..." -- that moms and dads [at some point in time] look like their children.

Because sometimes they don't.

And what you’re really doing when you compare and share your own childhood photos with photos of your children is actually “othering” my child -- as well as all the other precious children who don’t share their parents’ genetics.

Compare ‘em if you must... 

Share ‘em amongst yourselves. 

But I’m asking you – please, for the life of me -- consider the implications of sharing those side-by-side comparisons with the world.

Young minds are listening.

They are watching and learning.

Don’t teach them that moms and dads always look like their children.

Instead, teach 'em this:

Love makes a family.

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