If you’re a woman — especially a married woman — you’ve likely been asked when you’re gonna start pushing babies out of your hoo-hah. And if you’ve struggled with infertility, you’ve likely felt like throat-punching every single person who asks when you’re going to have kids because they sure as shit don’t know the infertile hell you’ve been trudging through trying to get that BFP (Big Fat Positive).
Here’s how infertile women really want to respond to the obtrusive and dreaded, “When are you having kids?” question:
When my hysterosalpingogram shows my fallopian tubes are open and a catheter is shoved up my vagina 36 hours after I give myself a huge-ass HCG trigger shot in my butt to stimulate ovulation and inject sperm that’s been processed and washed to ensure it contains a high enough motility and morphology score to even swim its way up my uterine cavity and reach the eggs I’ve stimulated for the past two weeks with injectable FSH medications.
Stare at them. Break out into unintelligible screaming until the individual’s eyes bulge in pure panic. Then stop and stare again. Gasp for breath. Snort a few times, then stop. Don’t say a word. Just stare at them until they walk away so traumatized and confused by your response that they’ll be too scared to ever ask anyone that question again.
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A Tremendous Honor For My Favorite Story
Why I'm Grateful for Years of Infertility