4/20/2017

The Moment The World Stopped in The Ultrasound Room

I woke up at 5 a.m.

I couldn't sleep. In fact, I tossed and turned almost all night.

Today was a big day, and my mind seemed to know it.

The house was still quiet when I poured a cup of my favorite coffee (roasted and packaged here in Iowa, by the way). I sipped the smooth liquid goodness in my beloved, coffee-stained mug until I heard the pitter-pattering feet of my toddlers down the hallway.

"Mommy, is baby here today?!" our 3-year old yelled excitedly.

She knew I was going to see Baby at the doctor, but she didn't quite understand that Baby would still be growing inside my belly for a few more months.

After breakfast, my in-laws and our gaggle of girls waved goodbye to my husband and me from the window.

We were going to catch a glimpse of our family's fourth miracle, and we couldn't have been more excited.
Pregnant After Infertility: Waiting Room Selfie
When the ultrasound tech ushered us back, I was nervous. But the moment I saw two little hands and two tiny feet squirming on the screen in front of me, I felt like the world stopped.

The tech handed me a tissue to catch the tears rolling down my cheeks.

There was something about seeing this life inside my belly -- something I never thought I'd get to experience once, let alone twice -- that brought me an overwhelming sense of gratitude.

This journey of ours hasn't been easy. In fact, there are days it's been really, really hard. But then there are moments -- moments like today in that ultrasound room -- where I am in awe at the abundance of gifts given to me. Where I wish I'd be able to go back in time and tell my hurting, infertility-battered self, "Hold tight...the best is yet to come." 

Our family hasn't turned out how I would've planned, but it certainly is more beautiful than we could have ever imagined.

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